It's sad that death could stop your life so suddenly that it makes life before the call and after almost like two incoherent days.  

I wish I could have told you before you passed that I loved you and that I will always will.  I wanted to share with you that you will always be my spirited, strong-hearted, lovable, and strong-willed grandfather, and I will always remember you for the fun times we've shared and the little tiny moments where it makes everything seem so much better.  I am glad in a way, that you are free of pain now and you can alas be with your wife again; but however I try to make the situation all seem better, in the end, it was still heart-breaking to see you go.

You have lived for almost a century, a very respectable feat.  I mean you still had all your original set of teeth left!  Not many people can pull that off!  My biggest regret to this day is my inability to come visit you more often.  With this post-graduate program I'm in and all, I literally get home at midnight and sometimes leave very early in the morning all in the name of school.   Excuses, I guess.  But no, in all seriousness,  I could not, and I sincerely hope you understood and knew that in your heart that I cared very much about you and loved you a lot before the passing.  I was planning to visit you today, talk about timings.  I was a day late, and I am so sorry.  

Most people probably thought I was cold-hearted or something cause I didn't cry when I saw you lying there.  Due to the past, I ceased to be able to cry in public, but throughout the whole night, my heart felt like a dozen knives have just punctured it in various places.  I wanted to speak to you, to tell you things out loud, to your face, cause I believe you could still hear me, but it wasn't my place to, so I went home with a heavy heart that night and spoke to you shinning ever so brightly in the skies.  However morbid this may sound, I also wanted to hug you, to hold your hand one last time, but once again, unfortunately, it really wasn't my place to do all that.  As soon as my bedroom door closed, tears flowed non-stop, as I sat there crying, reminiscing all the times of what a great and wonderful man you are.                 

However much it hurts, I do truly believe it is time for you to live through the rest of your years to the end of time in harmony and in merriness with my grandmother, as I genuinely believe you both greatly deserved it.  

I love you and I will always miss you, my dear grandfather.  Your memories will live on.  May you forever rest in peace.  



03/03/2012